Four Months

Four Months.   Hard to believe it.

 

But here we are....

 

Four months ago- this.........

 

 



 

 

Now, this..............

 

We had a less than stellar photo shoot this AM- so forgive us.  She doesn't care to have her picture taken solo.  She prefers to join in on any other picture being taken!  :)

The last month has been a whirlwind of activities- from Thankgiving to the Christmas festivities.  She's loving every minute of it, as she discovers it for the first time.

Vocabulary continues to blossom.  I do believe that language may be the area she lags behind most in as she works to catch up to her peers- and I believe that this is a result of lack of stimulation in the orpahange setting.  She was kept in a baby room with little chance to develop the necessary skills to communicate. 

Her word vocab is growing and continues to grow- but she has problems connecting it all together in the art of language.   For example- answering questions.  Although we did finally break through with her answering NO around the 2 month mark- she is still unable to answer YES to a question.  Instead she will repeat the word back to you if the answer is yes... Such as.....  "Do you want to eat?"  "EAT" (instead of yes).    There are many other similar instances like this that lead me to believe that her language/speech will perhaps be our greatest hurdle to overcome.  

However, she is determined & very focused.  So I believe she'll prevail over time!  And we'll do what we can to help her.

She has shown more 'play' this month vs 'collecting'.  (although she still does her very LARGE share of collecting still).    But will now play for short periods of time with Sarah in petshops or dolls or cooking in the play kitchen.   By far, her favorite activity is to hoard papers/treasures.  And to help me with all chores (can't complain too much about that!!)  Particular favorites are folding laundry, wiping up messes with Clorox Wipes & putting the silverwear away.   When I say favorites, I mean she gets ANGRY if I am doing them and I won't let her help.  So, I give up... help me girl!  I'll take it!  And teach your sisters while you are at it......

The biggie this month has been attachment steps.  Meaning we are finally taking steps in the right direction with this.  I felt it coming & indeed, this month it did.    She firmly knows that I am Mommy now.  And that Daddy is Daddy.  And who Sarah & Becca are...and how the 5 of us all fit together....within the word Family & Home.   Both in her vocab & using properly.  

She has started to look to me to fill her needs.  And want me in her times of conflict.  There is more being upset when either Kurt or I leave...and less of going to and running to others when they come into our house.   Instead, staying by me (but not always... this is just beginning). 

All in all, the steps she's taken are VERY positive and the moves in the right direction.  Finally!  (Many of the steps she's JUST taking, others were taking IN China).    Another good thing is she has formed an attachment to 2 items.  This is important in development & she was uniterested in this for much of the previous 4 months.  But this month she found two things that she loves.  And sleeps with & travels with..... every day.

They are a small Minnie Mouse and a very ugly stuffed Turkey that was not even meant to  be hers.... I bought it for Sarah because it was a Beanie Boo & she collects them.  However, Charlie attached and now it's hers!  This attachment to these two objects are good things in the path we still walk.

The two issues I want to continue to work on next with attachment is looking to me when HURT (like falls, trips, ect.)  When we first got her, she would hurt herself...and then laugh.  Clearly, no one cared before & so either she hurt herself for attention & it was percieved as 'funny' or she used laughter becasue she didn't know how to place the proper emotion for hurt.    I'm talking major owies were met with laughter.    That has moved into her getting hurt, stopping.. NOT laughing.  BUT physically taking effort to remove herself FROM ME when I got to help her.  Telling me NO.  So she is still not trusting to me to help her hurts- still relying on herself.  But at least not laughing anymore.

The other issues is night wakings.  We have an excellent bonding nighttime routine before bed.  She and I both enjoy it & I have little issues GETTING her to bed.  It's the night wakings.  Which are frequent still.   She wakes up in an almost primative state (similiar to what she displayed A LOT in all actions back in China & those first few months).   Almost trance like...she chants as she ferciously rocks herself back and forth.   No loud cries, no calling out... just chants & rocks.  If I got to her, she pulls away from me & my touch.   She continues to chant...and rock...till she puts herself back to sleep. But if she wakes with this cycle once during a night- it tends to repeat itself MANY times in one night.  It's hard....   and I'm not sure how to break it. 

Food is fine.  I figued out how to hid veggies in her Mac and Cheese and Noodles.  Still won't touch milk or fruits or veggies by themselves.  Favorite still is Pasta.

She's funny.  Often blaming her farts on who ever is sitting next to her.  Example... we hear a fart.... we know it came from her... "Charlie did you fart?".  No.  Daddy fart...and point to Daddy. 

She loves to be tickled and her baths.  To be chased by daddy to run into my arms saying 'up, up' as she giggles uncontrolably.   She likes to read her book "Pig Kahuna" every night.  I think she has it memorized. 

She's interested in everything we do.  Every day the girls come home with homework & she pulls out her beloved "Kindergarten Journal", asks for a pencil & and says "homework" and does her self imposed homework along with them.   

We baked cookies & she decorated them gleefully.  Then even though she didn't like the taste- she sat there and looked at her cookies for HOURS- so proud of her work.

   

She's come so far.  So, so far.   She's such an amazing little imp who has brought much joy & laughter to our lives.

As Kurt said the other day.. as she layed snuggled in his arms, laughing away at something... "Can you believe just a few months ago neither she nor us had this?"

Nope, I can't... but I'm so glad we have each other now.

Happy 4 months Charlie Meifang.